Some of you  are probably gonna be a little miffed with me. I copied a recent blog and gave it a new name. Why? I think it has an important message, maybe one of the most important I have written, but for what ever reason (I think it is the name) it has been one of if not the least read blogs I have written. If you have already read it I won’t apologize further because it is probably worth a second reading. if you haven’t read it all I can say is “Welcome.”

 

 

Jan 21

Matthew 20

 

I was thinking about things that are really hard to do this morning. It all started when I tried to put about 50 coat hangers of various styles and sizes into a plastic garbage bag. I’ll wait a minute for you to picture this and for those of you who will go try it for yourself right now. Imagine the theme song from Jeopardy right here. Need more sound effects? Just for fun go pick up and drop those 50 hangers on a hardwood floor several times. Finished? Good, now let me.  I got up as usual and after finishing my morning coffee and reading routine I decided to go for a short run. This proved to be a preface for my “things that are hard to do” thoughts because it was only 7 degrees when I went out. All through the process of dressing for running success, which includes multiple layers of polytechnic gear and a reflective jacket that keeps me from being run over by most drivers; at least the drivers who took the time to clear the ice from their windshields so they could see, I kept repeating one of the things I always say; “If it was easy anybody could do it.” As I left the house I reminded my wife of another one of the things I always say. “If I am not back in 45 minutes, call 911.” I am not writing this from the hospital so I obviously returned within the 45 minute time limit. When I did return I began the process of removing all the clothing I had donned for the run. I was looking for a place in the closet to rehang them except since they were now a little wet from the combination of sweat and condensation as a result of my warm body colliding with the cold air, I  wanted to create extra space for the wet running clothes. As I was adjusting the hangers to accommodate my wet running clothes space goal I discovered that there was no more space to be acquired. Upon further investigation I realize that the problem was,ironically, too many hangers. In fact there were so many hangers in the closet that there was no room for clothes, especially wet ones that needed space. Where do all these hangers come from? I would love to hear your theory on this phenomenon. My theory is that coat hangers are really reincarnated socks. That’s right. It seems that no matter how many pairs of socks I buy I am always running out or can never find a matching pair. And yet even though I never buy coat hangers, my closet is full of them; all kinds of them. So, somehow in the biological lifecycle of the sock a metaphysical change takes place during the wash/dry cycle and certain ones of them, only God knows which ones, turn into coat hangers. I haven’t figured out how they go from the washer or dryer to the closet but I am still working on it. Anyway, right then and there, as I considered my wet runing clothes space conundrum I decided upon a total closet makeover which led to the discovery of the difficulty associated with placing coat hangers into a garbage bag. I actually think they understood their final destiny and they were fighting me. I will confess that I gave up on the garbage bag idea and eventually began grabbing the wiry little devils by the handfuls and carrying them to the garbage can in the garage. I think one actually bit me. It took several trips but persistence prevailed.  I don’t know where they will show up next or in what form.

In my reading today from Mathew 20 I realized that there is something harder for humans  to do than use a garbage bag as a wire coat hanger removal vehicle. That is; live without ulterior motives. To understand Matthew 20 you have to read the last portion of Matthew 19. Jesus had just finished an impactful conversation with a rich young man who claimed to love God, but when confronted with the cost of truly loving God, his ulterior motives were revealed. Then Peter, thinking somehow he has escaped this measure because he and his friends had “left everything to follow Jesus” asks a question laden with ulterior motives.

“Jesus, said Peter, we have left everything to follow you. What then will there be for us?”

Let me interpret this question for you. “Jesus, what is in it for me?” Therein lies the ulterior motive. It really was the same question the rich young man was asking only from a different perspective.  Herein is the warning loud and clear. We are all vulnerable to this mindset. Isn’t that question at the heart of what we are all asking as we move through life? “What is in it for me?” It doesn’t matter if we ask the question or seek to live by this value from a mindset of abundance or one of sacrifice, if the bottom line is “what is in it for me?” it is less than the attitude God desires for our life and actually is counterintuitive to the purposes of God. So the Holy Spirit records the words of Matthew 20 in order to examine this temptation towards ulterior motives.  Matthew 20 begins with a story about a businessman who hires people to work in his business. He hires them at different intervals but for the same amount of compensation.  Jesus used terms with which we are more familiar or at least more comfortable than that of ulterior. In essence what he said is that being last is the hardest thing for us to do. Think about it. When was the last time you encouraged yourself or one of your family members or a friend with the words, “I hope you finish last.” Do any of you remember who finished in last place in any venue where placement matters, be it academic, sport or business? We don’t like last. There is within each human a longing to be first. I learned this from my children and I get a refresher course each time I visit with my grandchildren. I think this may be true because we are lost. Something with which and for which we were created stirs in us this craving. And this craving for restoration can lead to frustration equivalent to that of trying to cram 50 wire coathangers into a plastic garbage bag. It just doesn’t work. The solution to being lost is learning to be last. That is why Jesus turns the whole notion of being first upside down and says,

“…the first will be last and the last will be first.

Maybe another rendering of this would be, ” the first will be lost….”

In verse 26 and 27 he uses some other terms that may not be as comfortable to hear. He says, addressing another manifestation of the ulterior motive menace,

“Not so with you. Instead whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave – (catch this next phrase please) “JUST as the son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many. “ Actually in this one sentence Jesus reveals the answer to the problem of the ulterior motives. I call it the Ultimate Motive. Remind me to write about it sometime.

The idea of being last rather than first or in other words, understanding, acknowledging and dealing with the tendency to live by ulterior motives is inextricably connected to the whole redemptive purpose of God.  To the degree we confess and deal with our tendency to approach life with ulterior motives our life will contribute more fully to the plan of God in saving people from…..well, from their ulterior motives. Ulterior motives really are the thing that is our greatest hang up.

In fact without going into detail here, I will just say that Matthew 20 reveals at least three root causes of the ulterior motives that we struggle to overcome. They are; Self preservation or saving ourself; Self promotion or selling ourself and Self proclamation or seeing ourself. See if you can discover how they are revealed and dealt with in these stories. Let me know what you think.  That is what I think. But it is…

Just a thought.

Gotta go…I have to go look for some socks that match.

 

March 2

Personal Gods

Exodus 32:1-6

The people said to Aaron, “Come make for us gods who will go before us. As for this man Moses…. we don’t know what has happened to him.” Exodus 32:1

As I listened to one of the most popular christian songs of the last ten years I had an epiphany.  An epiphany is one of those moments when in the cartoons a light bulb goes on over one of the character’s heads. “Shazam” would be another descriptive term for the moment. I had just run out to the store to get a few items that I am sure I couldn’t live without until tomorrow. On the way back from the store I was supposed to stop at my sister in law’s house and pick up our nephew who is staying the night with us. No I didn’t start listening to music and forget to stop and get my nephew. Some of you know me too well. After securing the necessary items at the store I went immediately to get my nephew. As I was buckling him into his seat he asked me what he always asks me whenever I drive him anywhere, “Hey Doug, can we turn the music up really loud?” You see we have this routine of turning on whatever cd that is currently in the disc player and turning it up really loud and then playing the drums on the steering wheel or dashboard or seatback or whatever suffices for drumming at the moment. Sometimes I will let him play air guitar. Please don’t tell my sister in law. The only thing different about this time was that I chose to drive my wife’s van because it was parked in the garage and was warm, unlike my truck which was parked outside and also was nearly out of gas. All this to say that I didn’t really know what cd was in the player that I was about to turn on and up to maximum volume. It was only a short drive so I didn’t really care if it wasn’t one of my favorites. So on and up it went. Oh how I wish I had known what song was going to play. I have never really liked the song that came on but never understood why. Honestly there a lot of things about contemporary westernized christianity of which I have grown weary and I think what happened in that moment was I suddenly realized I didn’t like song because its lyrics represent most of what troubles me about what we call, “christianity.” It is a song about heaven. That seems cool enough. But it is a song that invites the listener to think about their personal experience in heaven. That even seems cool enough on the surface but that is the first thing that troubles me. We don’t think deeply enough about our spiritual reality. I think too often we just want to think about something that makes us feel good or safe or loved or personally rewarded. However, if we are honestly thinking about heaven and how desperately we want to go there and spend eternity with the savior we love, then we must think also about the alternative to heaven because it is just as real and Jesus talked about it just as vividly and passionately.  Just as desperately as we want to go to heaven and be with Jesus we must desperately be involved in the accomplishment of the kingdom of heaven on this earth, which is to bring relief to the suffering and the good news to the poor. If we really believe in heaven and want to go there then we must learn how to spend ourselves on helping others go there as well. I am tired of cocooning in the pleasantries of “christian” pop culture which includes music that helps us feel secure about our destiny while millions suffer presently and may suffer eternally unless we heaven bound hopefuls do something. The irony of heaven is that it is not about our personal experience; our comfort; our joy; our salvation. Heavenly thoughts are those that are centered and focused on the well being of everyone but “me.” The self oriented person, should they make it in by God’s grace, will be utterly bored with heaven because it won’t be about them. At all. Nothing.  Our “self” will be consumed in the presence of the God who revealed himself by fire and who is called “all consuming” in the letter to the Hebrews. For this I am grateful because, I don’t know about you but, “I” is my biggest problem.  I just had another epiphany so please excuse me as I interject it here. If we take Christ out of Christianity what is left is I-anity. (I like that thought so much I just added the word to my dictionary.)That is the other thing that bothers me. The fact that too often Christianity is reduced to a domesticated view of the God, who I just mentioned, is called all consuming, the God of fire. This view causes us to see God as someone who is responsible for serving us and taking care of us and meeting all of my/our needs. He is responsible for giving me/us the life I/we want. It becomes a movement about me and us, rather than about Jesus the Christ and his kingdom. My heart breaks over this mindset because too often we don’t even consider what God may want or require of us. Consequently we go shopping for the “characteristics” of God that make us feel better, comfortable, safe, holy, or at least the one that promises to give us the best life now. The truth about Christianity is that the word “Christian” was coined in the first century to refer to those people who, did not just believe in Jesus, but those who were living like Him. It was used of those who were following Jesus to the point of abandoning their lives to the cause, needs, goals and ideals of the way of Jesus; i.e., the kingdom of Heaven or the kingdom of God on earth.  This “shopping for God” leads to what is known as syncretism. Better look it up. It is the tendency to mix together all the aspects of religious characteristics until we arrive at a god concoction that suites our perceived needs; to concoct, really, what amounts to a personal god. That is what was happening in Exodus. God, through the savior Moses, had just delivered his people Israel from the power and rule of Egypt, a culture that had a “god” for everything. He had revealed himself to them in 10 different miraculous ways as their deliverer from Egypt. Now as He is leading them on the journey He reveals himself as the one true God who is a consuming fire. And although He has taken them out from under the power and influence of Egypt, He has not yet taken the power and influence of Egypt out of them. He has called Moses up to the burning mountain to receive the words that will cleanse them and form them into the people who represent his name in the earth. Before Moses can receive the words and return to the people however, they lose patience and faith and hope. Consequently, in their faithless, impatient state they determine they need to fashion their own gods to go before them; something a little more predictable and manageable that they can follow. They cry out to Aaron, Moses’ brother who is the next best thing. “Aaron, make us gods to go before us. As for Moses, we don’t know what happened to him.” Make us/me a god who fits my needs. Make us something we are familiar with, something safe. So Aaron does something very interesting. He tells them all to take off the earrings of gold they were wearing and give them to him so he could fashion the “god” from that material. He took the earrings, threw them into a fire and according to Aaron, “the golden calf just popped out.” They had received those earrings in Egypt and wore them as a sign of their slavery. In essence what happened is that out of the thing that represented their slavery to the past they fashioned a god they could follow into the future; a personal god.  What is sad and syncretic (remember that word?) about it all is that they put God’s name on it, the one true God, the God who is a consuming fire God. They fashioned this thing out of their slavery and need and fear and faithlessness and impatience and called it “God.” They fashioned something that represented a “God” on their terms. A personal god.

My solution is not a song but it could be. Since I believe in and enjoy epiphanies let me tell you about another one. I was at a leadership meeting about a year ago listening to a man who had been involved in serving the poor for over 25 years. He was not really talking about what I am talking about but while he was talking, the genesis of these thoughts began taking shape in my heart. As he spoke I began to think about the reasons people study the bible, go to church, pray, belong to small groups, serve, etc. Often, I surmised, it is because they want to have a good life and they perceive that these activities will contribute to or create the life they want. I suddenly realized the consumeristic, syncretic potential in that approach to God. It would be so easy to gravitate towards the things that meet our needs and satisfy the criteria for the God we want to serve or the God we want to serve us; you know, a personal God.  At that moment I decided on a different approach. I would from that moment on “abandon myself” to bible study and to prayer and to small group and to serving etc, etc. In other words I would throw myself into the fire of God’s grace (figuratively of course) and see what came out. Hopefully what comes out is a person for God not just a personal god.

 

Just a thought, albeit a long, serious one.

Gotta go…out of milk.

Dance with God

 

 

  

Jan 21

Matthew 20

 

Coat Hanger Theology

I was thinking about things that are really hard to do this morning. It all started when I tried to put about 50 coat hangers of various styles and sizes into a plastic garbage bag. I’ll wait a minute for you to picture this and for those of you who will go try it for yourself right now. Imagine the theme song from Jeopardy right here. Need more sound effects? Just for fun go pick up and drop those 50 hangers on a hardwood floor several times. Finished? Good, now let me.  I got up as usual and after finishing my morning coffee and reading routine I decided to go for a short run. This proved to be a preface for my “things that are hard to do” thoughts because it was only 7 degrees when I went out. All through the process of dressing for running success, which includes multiple layers of polytechnic gear and a reflective jacket that keeps me from being run over by most drivers; at least the drivers who took the time to clear the ice from their windshields so they could see, I kept repeating one of the things I always say; “If it was easy anybody could do it.” As I left the house I reminded my wife of another one of the things I always say. “If I am not back in 45 minutes, call 911.” I am not writing this from the hospital so I obviously returned within the 45 minute time limit. When I did return I began the process of removing all the clothing I had donned for the run. I was looking for a place in the closet to rehang them except since they were now a little wet from the combination of sweat and condensation as a result of my warm body colliding with the cold air, I  wanted to create extra space for the wet running clothes. As I was adjusting the hangers to accommodate my wet running clothes space goal I discovered that there was no more space to be acquired. Upon further investigation I realize that the problem was,ironically, too many hangers. In fact there were so many hangers in the closet that there was no room for clothes, especially wet ones that needed space. Where do all these hangers come from? I would love to hear your theory on this phenomenon. My theory is that coat hangers are really reincarnated socks. That’s right. It seems that no matter how many pairs of socks I buy I am always running out or can never find a matching pair. And yet even though I never buy coat hangers, my closet is full of them; all kinds of them. So, somehow in the biological lifecycle of the sock a metaphysical change takes place during the wash/dry cycle and certain ones of them, only God knows which ones, turn into coat hangers. I haven’t figured out how they go from the washer or dryer to the closet but I am still working on it. Anyway, right then and there, as I considered my wet runing clothes space conundrum I decided upon a total closet makeover which led to the discovery of the difficulty associated with placing coat hangers into a garbage bag. I actually think they understood their final destiny and they were fighting me. I will confess that I gave up on the garbage bag idea and eventually began grabbing the wiry little devils by the handfuls and carrying them to the garbage can in the garage. I think one actually bit me. It took several trips but persistence prevailed.  I don’t know where they will show up next or in what form.

In my reading today from Mathew 20 I realized that there is something harder for humans  to do than use a garbage bag as a wire coat hanger removal vehicle. That is; live without ulterior motives. To understand Matthew 20 you have to read the last portion of Matthew 19. Jesus had just finished an impactful conversation with a rich young man who claimed to love God, but when confronted with the cost of truly loving God, his ulterior motives were revealed. Then Peter, thinking somehow he has escaped this measure because he and his friends had “left everything to follow Jesus” asks a question laden with ulterior motives.

“Jesus, said Peter, we have left everything to follow you. What then will there be for us?”

Let me interpret this question for you. “Jesus, what is in it for me?” Therein lies the ulterior motive. It really was the same question the rich young man was asking only from a different perspective.  Herein is the warning loud and clear. We are all vulnerable to this mindset. Isn’t that question at the heart of what we are all asking as we move through life? “What is in it for me?” It doesn’t matter if we ask the question or seek to live by this value from a mindset of abundance or one of sacrifice, if the bottom line is “what is in it for me?” it is less than the attitude God desires for our life and actually is counterintuitive to the purposes of God. So the Holy Spirit records the words of Matthew 20 in order to examine this temptation towards ulterior motives.  Matthew 20 begins with a story about a businessman who hires people to work in his business. He hires them at different intervals but for the same amount of compensation.  Jesus used terms with which we are more familiar or at least more comfortable than that of ulterior. In essence what he said is that being last is the hardest thing for us to do. Think about it. When was the last time you encouraged yourself or one of your family members or a friend with the words, “I hope you finish last.” Do any of you remember who finished in last place in any venue where placement matters, be it academic, sport or business? We don’t like last. There is within each human a longing to be first. I learned this from my children and I get a refresher course each time I visit with my grandchildren. I think this may be true because we are lost. Something with which and for which we were created stirs in us this craving. And this craving for restoration can lead to frustration equivalent to that of trying to cram 50 wire coathangers into a plastic garbage bag. It just doesn’t work. The solution to being lost is learning to be last. That is why Jesus turns the whole notion of being first upside down and says,

“…the first will be last and the last will be first.

Maybe another rendering of this would be, ” the first will be lost….”

In verse 26 and 27 he uses some other terms that may not be as comfortable to hear. He says, addressing another manifestation of the ulterior motive menace,

“Not so with you. Instead whoever wants to become great among you must be your servant, and whoever wants to be first must be your slave – (catch this next phrase please) “JUST as the son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve and to give his life as a ransom for many. “ Actually in this one sentence Jesus reveals the answer to the problem of the ulterior motives. I call it the Ultimate Motive. Remind me to write about it sometime.

The idea of being last rather than first or in other words, understanding, acknowledging and dealing with the tendency to live by ulterior motives is inextricably connected to the whole redemptive purpose of God.  To the degree we confess and deal with our tendency to approach life with ulterior motives our life will contribute more fully to the plan of God in saving people from…..well, from their ulterior motives. Ulterior motives really are the thing that is our greatest hang up.

In fact without going into detail here, I will just say that Matthew 20 reveals at least three root causes of the ulterior motives that we struggle to overcome. They are; Self preservation or saving ourself; Self promotion or selling ourself and Self proclamation or seeing ourself. See if you can discover how they are revealed and dealt with in these stories. Let me know what you think.  That is what I think. But it is…

Just a thought.

Gotta go…I have to go look for some socks that match.

 

Jan. 13

I am in Rapid City, South Dakota. I was invited here by a friend who leads a large, active, missional congregation. A few years ago they made a decision that changed their direction and their destiny. That’s what decisions do; either for the better or the worse. They decided to become actively engaged with the Native American population and culture in the community where there church was located. Their decision led them through and to some very difficult tests of faith. As we dedicated the Community/Ministry Center that has become the symbol of their focus and their faith I was glad to announce to them that in my opinion they had passed the “Faith Test.” Read on.   

Genesis 22                                         

This is a test

I love flying. Probably a good thing since I have to fly a lot in my job. Sidebar. I never know if I should call what I do “my job” because, for one; I really love what I do and two; It doesn’t seem like work. For that I am grateful. Anyway, since I fly a lot I am interested in airplanes; especially big ones that fly fast and far and carry lots of people to faraway places. I guess that is what I am really interested in; people in faraway places. Recently I was watching a documentary about the development and construction of the Boeing 787. It is the newest plane that carries more people, flies faster and farther and more efficiently than any of its predecessors. I was hooked at faster and farther. There are two things about planes that always get my attention; the engines and the wings. I am intrigued by how the engines, called turbines, even though they are so small in relationship to the plane, can generate enough power and speed to cause the plane to lift or fly. And hardly a flight goes by that I don’t wonder what would happen if one of the engines stopped working or even more interestingly, fell off… it seems like there should be more than just two engines. I mean if two are good wouldn’t three be better, one just in case of emergency. But I have read that most modern day planes could, if necessary, take off, fly and land on only one engine. Who knows maybe they have done just that and I just wasn’t aware of it. Three still seems like a better number of engines. Speaking of emergencies; I love to sit in the emergency or as it is politically correctly called, the exit row. We don’t like to talk about emergencies when we are flying fast and far. Obviously there are lots of reasons to enjoy the exit row such as more leg room and being able to be one of the first ones out of the plane in case of emer…..well in case we need to exit in a hurry. I like to sit in the “exit row” for reasons you might not think. Usually the exit row is located right over the wings and since the engines are located right under the wings The exit row is a great place to watch two things. The engines and the wings. You see I want to be the first to know if one of the engines falls off. That also means I would be available to get the door open and help people out in case of……. needing to exit in a hurry.  But I also love to watch the wings at take off. I invite you to watch them at take off the next time you fly. In order to fly the wings have to provide lift for all the weight of the plane. Remember that the next time you are packing and jamming all that extra stuff into your suit case and carry on. So what happens is, as the plane picks up speed the wings start to lift. You can actually watch them flex or bend. With all the weight of the plane and your suitcases on board some of wings bend almost two feet at the end. Now not only am I watching to see if the engines are staying attached but, yep you guessed it, I am watching to make sure the wings don’t break off. I love flying. I just think it is really amazing to consider all the dynamics that are involved in every take off and landing. Landings by the way are sometimes referred to as controlled crashes but we won’t talk about that here.  So I am watching the documentary and it has an entire segment on the development and function of the wings of the new 787. Since this plane is going to carry more people who know they are going farther so they probably packed a lot more stuff, the wings really have to be able to lift tremendous amounts of weight. In order to discover how much weight the design of the wings could carry the engineers put the wings in a giant press made to test wing strength. I didn’t even know one of those things existed. I was amazed to watch the wing during the test as it flexed or bent nearly in half before it failed (broke). The engineers discovered that the wings could withstand more than ten times the amount of stress placed on them during landings or take offs or more importantly “extreme turbulence” while flying. All those bumps and ups and downs probably put more pressure on the wings than anything. Now I don’t know about you but after watching the wing test on the documentary I was relieved. I am relieved to know that the plane manufacturing company tested the wings BEFORE they actually started flying the plane with people and their overstuffed luggage on board. Really, do you want to be on a flight where the pilot comes on the intercom just before takeoff, welcomes everyone on board and announces that the plane you’re on has never been tested and he is not sure if it will take off, fly or land without problems?  I am glad they test planes before they actually fly them with passengers on board. It is important to know the weight bearing capacity or strength of the wings. It gives everyone a greater sense of confidence and faith.

These thoughts came to me as I read the story of Abraham in Genesis 22 this week. It occurred to me that  what God is doing at this point in Abraham’s life is testing his capacity.  I encourage you to read it for yourself because I really don’t want to type it all out here, but when God asked Abraham to take his son Isaac; the promised son born to Abraham in his old age, and sacrifice him on an altar, I think God was saying, “I would like to know  Abraham’s capacity.” “How much weight can he bear?” “Will his faith hold up under the strain of what I am asking him to do?” The verse that caught my attention in the story this time is verse 14.

“And to this day it is said, ‘On the mountain of the Lord it will be provided.”

As a result of this test Abraham discovered his own capacity and it changed his faith and life and confidence. The wings held. Consequently Abraham flew faster and farther for the rest of his life.

I think that is how it is in our life; on our faith journey. Our faith is like those wings; it is what gives lift to our life and carries us. Sometimes we don’t know how much we can bear because we never allow our faith to be tested. We avoid altogether or  we back out of the difficult “presses” of life before the test is finished. This has direct consequences on the confidence factor in our life. It is important to know our capacity. It is important to God and it is important to know for ourselves what we can bear. Sure the presses of life are difficult but  how else will we know how far we can fly or how much we can carry unless we let God test us? What is your faith test about?

Just a thought

Gotta go! The next segment of the documentary is about toilets flushing while flying. Fascinating

 

 

December 27

Job 29 and 30

Did you miss me?

Everybody Loves the Good Ole Days.

“God whispers to us in our pleasure, speaks in our conscience, but shouts

in our pains: it is His megaphone to rouse a deaf world.” CS Lewis.

 

I weighed myself Christmas morning and came to a startling conclusion. I need a new scale. There is no way I could weigh what that scale indicated so the only conclusion is that it must be defective. Is it too late to request gifts for Christmas? This is an emergency. As I peered over my burgeoning belly I started thinking about the good ole days of high school when the scale was much friendlier and I had to bend my neck to see my belly button.

Then I started thinking about the more recent “good ole days.”

Remember when mortgages were as easy to secure as junk mail and mortgage money flowed like honey through the streets of every new subdivision and condo project. New cars of every size and style were being cranked out of factories and car lots like Dippin Dots. Do those still exist? Anyway….

Cruise offers and ultimate vacation destinations abounded. In fact they cluttered our mail boxes almost daily.

New electronic gadgets galore were the staple of conversations as friends compared notes on everything from new iPods to wii games.

The good ole days, when Christmas gifts overflowed the base of the tree and kids were singing their favorite carols. “All I want for Christmas is a new game boy, a new game boy, a new game boy”….  and a Mac Book and a ….well you know.  

Ahh the good life.. The good ole days when life was easy and distractions were plenty and credit was good and banks were friendly and when God seemed….well, normal.

It seemed like we were doing everything right, God was blessing us; life was good. Then the bottom fell out. Do I need to comment here? Whatever your bottom was it has probably been radically affected, and I am not talking about problems related to the scale here.

What happened… and why is this happening…better yet what is going to happen?

“What is going on God?”

During my daily reading this week I gained some valuable perspective from Job. He loved the “good ole days” as much as anyone.  I invite, actually I challenge you to read Job chapter 29. Verse 2 sets the tone for the entire chapter.

“How I long for the months gone by, for the days when God watched over me.”

Job remembered the good ole days and longed for them just as you and I and any person who is struggling would.

And just like many of us, he lamented the troublesome “tough now days” as well. I invite, yes I challenge you again; blah, blah, blah… to read Job 30 (I am so glad my daily reading guides included these two chapters on the same day.)

Anyway, verse 15 sums up Job’s lament in the chapter.

“Terrors overwhelm me; my dignity is driven away as by the wind, my safety vanishes like a cloud.”

I lovingly refer to chapters like this as the “Clean pages.” There is not a whole lot of underlining going on here. I am sure I will never see a refrigerator magnet with this verse on it.  Yet,these chapters have their place in the purposes of God as he works to form us into His people. They are vital in the understanding of God’s purposes in our problems.

And, if we keep reading we will discover that Job did, and we can, realize the Good News Days ahead that are as real as the prior two.

What changed for Job is what needs to change for us in order to experience the joy of renewal and the purposes of God in our life.

Job’s attitude is what changed. His ideas about his stuff… his wealth… his relationships….ownership… his sufficiency….his source!

Job viewed his behavior and his rightness as the source of his wealth and satisfaction. He thought if he just did things right… if he honored God regularly and loved others well… he would have all he wanted… and more, even to the point of sharing and supplying others. How noble! How admirable! How self centered! Why was he serving God?

What Job had to learn and we would do well to observe, is that God wants to be served and worshipped and revered not just for what rewards and personal benefits may be involved for us but, because He is God..because it is right! Because God is right and whatever He does is right. He is the Great Creator and Sustainer. He is the Grand Ideator and Life Giver. He is the Ultimate and Awesome power over all of creation. He is the Beautiful Lover and Forgiver but He is also the Great Judge and Justifyer as well.

Job had begun to judge God by the standard of his life and personal comfort. Now Job is being judged by the realities of personal trial and discomfort.    

Job had become…I don’t know how else to say it….overweight with stuff and success;  And he has suddenly stepped on the scale and doesn’t like what he sees. So like me, and you and anyone who has ever stepped on a scale and lamented the facts; we want a new scale. It must be the scale. It can’t be me. Can it?

Just a thought!

Merry Christmas

Dance with God

Mark 8

August 31, 2008

 

Ships are safe in the harbor, but that is not why ships are built.” Sarah Palin

 

How to get rid of God

God bothering you? He has been known to do that. Before you answer quickly and patently I invite you to think about something.  I have heard that God comforts the afflicted and afflicts the comfortable. The comfortable among us should take note. God is not comfortable with our state or paradigm of comfort seeking. I was in a conversation with someone recently and quoted the above statement. It was interesting to watch the reaction. The person literally had to get up from the table where we were talking and take a walk. This person became very upset at the thought that God was not comfortable with their need for comfort. They were very bothered by the idea that God would be so concerned about their comfort level that He would go out of His way to bother them. They started thinking that God was going to dream up some terrible thing to do to them just because they were comfortable. I have to at least applaud this person for being willing to admit that they are a comfort seeker. How many of us would do that? How many of us would be open to knowing if we are too comfortable for God. How do we know if we are a comfort seeker or even a comfort addict for that matter? It is a question worth pondering. I have been pondering it for some time because I am contemplating serious change in my life and have to admit it means challenging that which is comfortable in my life. Actually I would say it is more familiar than comfortable. I have not been comfortable for some time but I am asking myself if I am willing to leave the familiar. For me the answer is easy. I always find God in the unknown if I am obediently following. Too often we lose God in the familiar; i.e. we trade God for comfort.  I suppose it is especially crucial for leaders to be sensitive to this natural tendency towards the ease of familiarity. I suppose leaders may be among those whom God challenges most when it comes to this issue. I was reading today about some leaders that Jesus was making very uncomfortable. They had perfected the system of the familiar…the comfortable. The religious leaders of Jesus’ day worked hard to maintain an environment of personal control which provided them with an enjoyable level of comfort. They made the rules and expected people to follow. I guess what upset them most is that Jesus didn’t play by their rules. In fact, he changed the whole game. Isn’t that what makes us nervous? God tends to mess things up just when we get everything adjusted to our liking….just when we get comfortable. In Mark 8:1- 13, I see all these dynamics at work. Jesus had been out in the countryside with a large crowd of people for several days. In the leaders minds he was “brainwashing” them with new ideas. This could only lead to lack of control and discomfort. They had to challenge it. So, after Jesus performs what any rationally thinking human would consider a miracle…the feeding of over 4000 people with only a few scraps of food, the leaders show up with bright lights and start questioning Jesus. I suppose they wanted to know just who He thought he was to take their subjects away and fill their minds with who knows what. He was rocking their boat. So they question him. This was not just any kind of questioning. It says they tested him. It reminds me of the old west show down where the town big shot calls out the new hired hand to see who will rule the town. This questioning was about turf and authority. “Let’s see who is faster on the draw. Let’s see what you’ve got.” they challenged. Would we ever talk to God like that? I guess it depends on how he is interfering with our comfort level. It is a good question to consider. Of all things, they asked him for a sign. Where were they when the miracle feeding thing was happening? The response of Jesus to their challenge is in itself enough to convince me of his Godness. (He could have turned them into toast for their insolence.) Instead, He sighed deeply….painfully….and asked a question of them, “Why does this generation ask for a miraculous sign?” It is if he was asking, “Why can’t this generation believe?” The troubling, unrecorded but implied answer I perceive is that maybe they were too concerned with protecting their comfort level to believe. Then he did something that should startle all of us who value the familiar over faith. He left them! How discomforting. How afflicting! How contrary to a lot of what we hear! How paradoxical! How true!

Just a thought.

Dance with God

 

 

 

I’m talking trash today so here it is.

 

June 3

 

John 13

 

Interruptions

 

 “The great thing is, if one can, to stop regarding all the unpleasant things as interruptions in one’s ‘own’ or ‘real’ life. The truth is, of course, that what one regards as interruptions are precisely one’s life.”

 

C. S. Lewis

 

I learned a lesson from trash today. Ever notice how trash is everywhere. Ever notice how we tend to try not to notice trash. We want to avoid it; at least we want to distract ourselves from it. It is the bane of our existence. It is the residue of the activity of our life. It is the ‘necessary evil” the flows out of the necessary processes that sustain us. For most of us it is someone else’s worry, job, responsibility, concern. Caring for it or about it, is something most of us do not aspire to do and represents that which we least enjoy doing; cleaning up after ourselves. A visit to a landfill is worth the educational experience.

I notice trash wherever it may be. Regardless if I am able to or not I always want to do something about it. For me it has become the signature of serving those around me. If I can pick up someone else’s trash with an attitude of gratitude it is a good day. Weird isn’t it. But you know what is really weird. Washing someone else’s feet. That is what is happening in John 13. Evidently it is a custom or practice carried down through the ages since the time when people regularly walked around on dusty roads in open shoes. I am sure it is still practiced these days in environments that I just described and for the obvious reasons. The feet of people who walk on dusty roads in open shoes tend to get very dirty. So before entering a home or building they would look for a way to clean their feet. Makes sense. It would be like us taking off our dirty shoes at the door before entering a home; either ours or someone else’s. Where it is different, however, is we would take off our own shoes and would be shocked if someone else bent down to do that for us, especially if it happened in our own home. It is conceivable, given the right circumstances, that someone could be employed to do such servile work but hardly.  However inconceivable it may be, that is precisely how it is done in cultures where washing feet is the standard greeting. And that is how it was done in the times when Jesus walked in open sandals among us. The servant with the least seniority in the house would be responsible for this disgusting but expected task. All these thoughts started stirring in my mind while I was reading John chapter 13.

After reading John 13 I asked myself. “How does washing feet translate into the 21^st century? It seems so weird, so out of character in our modern age. I even made a prayer out of my question, which has become a very good classroom for me. I asked, “Lord please show me what it means to ‘wash feet’ in 21^st century western civilization and anywhere for that matter. I know it is done in a symbolic way occasionally in places of Christian influence, but I want to know how to do it in a substantive way. How does it work in the real world? Anybody else care about such stuff?

After my prayer I didn’t hear any “thunder” and came to no real conclusions so I went for a run/walk. (I used to go for a run after reading but these days run/walking is the best I can do for awhile. Read “Heart Issues” if you want to know more.)

Within the first 100 feet of the start of my….exercise, I saw a large cardboard box, obviously set out for trash collection. It was tipped over with its contents, several hundred of those little white packing peanuts, spilled out and beginning to scatter in the wind. Of course I stopped and gratefully picked up the box, replaced the peanut contents and set it back in its place. Score one for the good guys. As I continued my journey I began to notice trash everywhere, which was strange because I had just run this route the day before and I hadn’t notice it then. Either my trash detection senses had been diminished the day before or an inordinate amount of trash had accumulated over the last 24 hours. I tend to think it was the latter. Either way I determined I would remedy the trash situation on the way back. I ran to my usual place where I celebrate my exercise with a donut and a cup of coffee. Ah the good life. Before I left I asked if I could have one of their little carry out plastic bags in which to place the trash I would be collecting on the return trip, or what I would now call, a mission from God. Speaking of whom, it is interesting that as soon as I began the return route, a large empty bag, one which was used for landscaping mulch, blew right across my path. It was if God was saying my faith was too small. I grabbed the empty mulch bag in one hand and I looked at my little carry out bag in the other hand and realized that God had bigger plans than my little plastic carry out bag could handle. (Insert thunder here) So I set out with new inspiration as well as a larger bag. On my way I stopped for each piece of trash and placed it in the mulch bag. It didn’t matter what it was or how large or small, I grabbed it and placed it in the bag. As I continued the process of stopping and starting at each item (sometimes multiple items in one spot) one word came to my mind. “Interruptions!” Every item represented an interruption to my destination. Many times, if not every time I had to leave the sidewalk to retrieve the trash. Each time I stopped increased not only the length of my journey but also the weight of the bag.

The items were not unusual; just the stuff of life. The kinds of things people leave behind or jettison as they navigate through their day. Plastic bottles, styrofoam cups, various wrappers, dog droppings in their own bag, etc. You know; normal stuff.

 

 I began to hear the Spirit speaking through all of this trash gathering. With every stop and piece of trash His voice grew louder. The message I got out of it is that interruptions are a lot like washing feet. The foot washer, the lowest servant in the house, did not have his own daily agenda. His agenda was one of “interruptions.” Whatever the master of the house needed; whatever the days events brought, whatever people left behind, whatever interruptions came into play. You know; normal stuff. That was his agenda. And he was grateful for it. He was in his master’s home.

 

Being the multi-tasker that I am I continued to play out these thoughts during my meditative meanderings. I began to understand that Jesus’ life was a series of “divine” interruptions between the cradle and the cross that was dictated by all the normal stuff of the people of this world for which he cared so deeply.  John 13 captures the essence of this serving attitude during what I would call one of his ultimate interruptions, as he pauses on the way to his appointment with the cross, he demonstrates the depth of his love for his church. During this interruption he even washes the feet of the one who was only moments from betraying him. It was the act of a menial servant as he placed himself under and at the disposal of others. What was shocking and inconceivable for his friends to watch as he played out this holy interruption has now become the kingdom standard for relating to one another and to God. He summarized his intentions and the new standard with these words.

 

“You call me ‘Teacher’ and ‘Lord,’ and rightly so, for that is what I am. Now that I your Lord and Teacher have washed your feet; you also should wash one another’s feet. I have set you and example that you should do as I have done for you. I tell you the truth, no servant is greater than his master, nor is a messenger greater than the one who sent him. Now that you know these things, you will be blessed if you do them.”

 

Interruptions to my schedule will never seem the same. I pray that I will see them as opportunities to wash the feet of those dealing with the normal stuff of life as they trudge through their daily routine.

 

One of the items that I bent down to pick up was a simple list of names handwritten on a sticky note. Maybe it was an invitation list or a list of people to call about sharing a ride somewhere. No matter, I sensed God in that interruption saying, “Pray for the people on that list.”  I did it because that is what interruptions are about; being bound, not to my own agenda but to the agenda of the one who first allowed his life to be interrupted for me by his death. I did it because I want to know what it is like to wash someone’s feet in the 21^st century

Several other things happened on that return trip. I took the long way back because of the joy in the journey. I also noticed that even though it took much longer to get back the path behind me was much brighter.

 

Just a thought or two

Gotta go.

Papers blowing across the yard.

 

 

Hey Y’all

After several trips and many crazy days and lots of adjusting to new medicines (maybe I’ll be inspired to write about all that sometime) I am back. I have noticed that many of you faithfully visit so thanks for that. I’ll continue to write when I can.

Enjoy.

 

I do hope we will pray faithfully for our friends in China and Myanmar as they struggle to make sense out of the tragedies that have occurred in their countries

 

Thunder

 

John 12

 

So when does God speak, and why and how and to whom. Wow, wouldn’t it be great if someone could answer those questions. As I write this I am trying to recall some of the ways God has spoken to me during my life. I remember the awe and the joy early in my developing relationship with Jesus of thinking that I could “talk to God” and believe that he would hear me and respond. I was very new in my faith but I wanted desperately to know this God who had spoken to me and raised me from my dead existence. Someone told me that the best way to know God was to begin reading His word regularly. Thank you who ever you are. God used you to save my life also. So, I was in my room many years ago and very early in my new faith, reading from I John 5. I remember it well. I had just read verse 11 that says, “God has given us eternal life, and this life is in his son. He who has the Son has life; he who does not have the Son of God does not have life.” I was amazed and overwhelmed by this simple but awesome truth and I closed my eyes and thought about that statement for a few minutes. Then I said something like this to God. “God why did you write this?” Please believe me when I say that I had never read the bible in my life so there is no way I would know what the next verse said. I opened the bible to begin reading again and the very next verse says, “I write these things to you who believe in the name of the Son of God so that you may know you have eternal life.” My heart, my faith, my joy were catapulted to new levels of life. God speaks! And he speaks to me. I learned an invaluable life principle that day.  God speaks and he has spoken and he continues to speak; primarily through his word. But when and why and to whom are also important questions to consider and answer. There have been a lot of terrible things done, some by well meaning people and some by charlatans, under the banner of “God told me.” I wish I had a perfect record when it comes to the issue of hearing from God. Many times I have read from the scriptures and come to conclusions that were, well, shall we say, not very wise or practical. Some of the results were hilarious; others, I sadly confess were disastrous. One time in my young and reckless faith days (how I miss those days) I decided that God wanted me to live by faith – completely. I have since learned that there is no other way to live by faith. It is either completely by faith or not at all. I think that may be why Jesus said if you only have faith in the amount of the size of a mustard seed you can do incredible things. Anyway, I decided that to really live by faith I should quit working and devote myself to studying and serving as much as possible. That was great until I ran out of money. But I continued to write checks believing that, by faith, the money would come from somewhere. And just to make sure God knew what I was doing I would write “Philippians 4:19” in the memo line of all the checks I wrote. That is the verse that says, “My God will supply all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus.”  At the time I think it was either my way of declaring, “Hey, I am living by faith here.” or maybe I was thinking that the people I was writing the checks to were believers and they would recognize the scripture reference and have pity on a young man trying to live “by faith.” I got a rude awakening when; of course, the checks bounced and came back to me. On one of the checks just above the memo line where I had written the secret code, “Philippians 4:19” someone in the accounting dept of the billing company wrote, “What’s this?” So much for the “have pity on a young man trying to live by faith.”  These people didn’t even know the verse or the secret code numbers.

Since that time I have learned that living by faith is more than developing a great idea or strategy and assuming God will cover all my “check writing” madness in the effort to accomplish my goals. I have learned that living by faith is living in obedience to God’s desires and dreams and directions. There is a fine line between our presumption upon God and our obedience to him, so I must give myself to understanding God and learning how to discern His voice. His voice comes in many ways: through his word; through his people; through the events and relationships of our lives and sometimes from all the above simultaneously.

I have learned some important principles to hearing and discerning God’s voice from John chapter 12.

In this chapter is a story of when Jesus, during a moment of reflection upon his impending torture and death by crucifixion, and out of the anguish of his soul, cried out to God with these words. “Father, glorify your name!” Astonishingly, in response to this petition, God answered the son He loved so dearly. And He answered audibly. At least that is what is inferred in the story. But this is where it gets tricky. Somehow this interchange was captured and recorded, so someone heard it. Others however, said it sounded like thunder. Perhaps like an inaudible rumbling throughout the heavens. Still others, it says, heard what they perceived to be the voice of angel, whatever that may sound like. The point is that there was some confusion caused by this God announcement. It is clear that Jesus heard and understood it so I like to review his listening attitude to learn how I can be a better listener which will allow me to live more obediently.

I think the first principle is that Jesus lived to hear God’s voice. It was his joy and strength and source of life. It was the priority of his life. The thing he loved more than anything else. That is crucial to hearing, discerning and obeying. He wanted God’s word to be fulfilled. That is why he exclaimed, “What shall I say, Father save me from this? No! It was for this purpose I came….”

Jesus listened with a heart devoted to God’s glory; regardless the cost to himself. He had just rehearsed in his mind what that cost would include when he described for his followers that, “Unless a kernel of wheat falls to the ground and dies it remains only a single seed. But if it dies it produces many seeds” He had no self agenda except to honor and glorify God. That is why God honored him and trusted him with a word from heaven.

God loves to speak into the life of those who devote themselves to seeing his word accomplished and to those who devote themselves to yielding personal, selfish agendas to His purposes.

Just a thought.

Gotta go.

Sounds like rain.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

April 14, 2008

 

I just returned from South Africa after a 10 day trip with some of the best students and student leaders God’s kingdom has to offer. We did a 2 day retreat for 20 teenage African orphan students and a 2 day VBS for younger orphan children. We work with an organization there called Horizon International. For more info check out the link on this site.

I wrote this post before I left but it is being published in our Northview Connection quarterly magazine so I waited till it came out before releasing this. Thanks for thinking with me.

 

Babies and Oceans

 

Recently my wife and I were visiting our daughter and her husband and their children in West Palm Beach. My daughter, Beverly, had just given birth to their third child and first son. His name is Benjamin Douglas. He is beautiful but he scares me. All babies scare me when they’re babies. I remember when we brought our twin boys home from the hospital. They were so tiny, so frail, so wrinkly. And I am so klutzy and clumsy. I always worried that I would drop one. And every one was always saying, “Make sure you hold their heads. Don’t let their heads fall back.” I was afraid one of their heads was going to fall off. All these thoughts came back to me when Beverly offered to let me hold Benjamin. Bravely, I mustered all my nerve and accepted the wonderful privilege of holding this little gift. And for about 3 minutes it was really great. Then my hands started going to sleep and then my arms and I started thinking, “If my shoulders go to sleep I know I will drop him and his head will fall off.” So I politely offered him back to his mother and asked if Ayla, the two year old, would like to go to the beach. I figured the best thing I could do would be to occupy the two year old and let mom and Ben bond. Now two year olds I can handle. Their heads are firmly attached, they can do more than cry to communicate their needs and they are very educational; especially at the beach. Ayla and I have been to the beach a few times and we have a routine. Once we get to the beach and arrange all her toys, she immediately wants me to take her favorite one, a little plastic watering can, and fill it with water from the ocean. She then proceeds to pour out the water from the can onto whatever creation she has made in the sand. Then she asks me to fill it up again. The watering can only holds about a quart of water so I am making quite a few trips to the water’s edge for refills. We had been playing like this for awhile when another toddler and her dad came up to investigate. Before long the two toddlers were taking turns pouring out the water and the two dads were taking turns running back and forth to the ocean. It wasn’t long before there was a dispute between the toddlers over whose turn it was to pour out the water. The dispute turned into to a screaming tug of war over the watering can. At this point I began reconsidering the virtues of holding sleeping infants. Actually I had an epiphany. Remember what I said about two year olds being educational at the beach. It suddenly occurred to me how adults can be just like children. Here were these two children fighting over a quart of water within 30 feet of the ocean. We two dads were more than happy to bring them all the water they could use, but they wanted that quart at that moment. What were they fighting over really? Whatever it was, it caused them to suddenly forget; sacrifice really, the vast resources of the ocean as they focused on that one quart of water. What vast resources do we as adults sacrifice as we fight to hold on to the familiar; the comfortable; the known; the whatever? I could never have imagined that my life would take me where it has. But I have always prayed that I will be brave enough to let God do whatever he wants in my life and not become stagnant in the familiar; the routine. The creedal scripture of my life is Romans 12:1,2 which says, “In view of God’s mercy I urge you to offer yourself as a living sacrifice, wholly acceptable to God which is your reasonable act of worship.” That one verse sums up the challenge I desire to both learn and live up to on a daily basis. It seems basic to the redeemed life. In an effort to apply this text in my life I have practiced a very simple discipline for the past 27 years. I take a blank sheet of paper and as I sign the bottom of it I pray that God would fill in the page that day. In essence I say, “God I sign off on whatever you want to do in my life.” This helps me because too often my tendency is to fill in all the lines of the page and then ask God to sign off on what I think is best. I would be sacrificing all the plans and resources God wants to pour into my life if I did that. That would be like fighting over a quart of water at oceans edge. It also helps me because I tend to want to live my life with a sense of control. Signing the page allows me to live with a sense of abandonment and faith. I guess that is like little Benjamin in my arms, completely; maybe even unconsciously trusting that I would never drop him and let his head fall off. I guess I can learn from babies too.

Just a thought

 

 

March 29

 

Psalm 86:11&12

 

Heart Issues

The words to a contemporary worship song popped into my head this week. They include, “My heart will choose to say.” Those words have gained new meaning in my life. When I think about our world I realize that cultures are defined by choices or the lack of opportunity to choose. We have so many choices in our culture. In fact, I read recently that one of the most important features to buyers of new cars when they are considering which model to purchase is….get ready for this……cup holders. While most of the rest of the world chooses between walking, using public transportation or not going, we are negotiating and fretting over the number and placement of cup holders in our vehicles. We are creatures of choice who have been created to choose. It is our destiny to choose and it is those choices that determine our destiny. The ability to choose is what sets us apart and makes us unique from all the rest of creation. Without the power to choose there can be no genuine love given or received. Our ability to choose is one of the evidences that God created us “in His image.” When I think about our world I also realize how choices illustrate and create power. That is why so many dictators and oppressive regimes limit and control choices… they cannot afford to allow the power of choice by the masses to interfere with their lust for control. So, I can see how unlimited choices can create cultural nearsightedness and how totally limited choices create cultural slavery. For both reasons I have a growing appreciation for the gift of choice and a growing sense of my need to steward this gift well. What will my heart choose? All my thoughts today have been percolating in my mind all week and are the result of something I did not choose. Last week I had a heart catheterization done. About 15 years ago I made a choice to get healthier so I began modifying my diet and running. If you saw me “running’ when I first started you probably wouldn’t have thought of it as running. You might have even thought I was a mail delivery person because my goal in the beginning was simply to run from one mail box to the next before I rested. If I had known then what I learned last Friday. Anyway, with time my distance grew along with the physical pleasure I derived from my new exercise regimen. I also enjoyed the sense of accomplishment that could be measured as I consistently made the choice to run; sometimes in spite of tiredness, foul weather (one snowy day I was almost hit by a snowplow) or other unpleasant circumstances. As I was running I even developed a series of thoughts about the 10 things I have learned from running. One of those thoughts is that “If it is easy, anybody can do it.” Choices are like that. Anybody can make the easy choices. While my running times improved and my distances grew and my insight expanded (some people question the latter), I never really felt that I was making the kind of progress I saw other runners make. I chalked it up to the fact that I started late in life and that others were just more naturally suited for running. But in the last 6 to 8 months my distance, my stamina, my energy have all deteriorated drastically to the point that I am completely fatigued after a short run. Being the insightful person I have become I said to myself, “Something is not right.” I scheduled an appointment with my doctor who sent me to a cardiologist who scheduled me for a heart catheterization. For those who may not know, a heart cath is a procedure where the doctor inserts a catheter into an artery in ones leg. Through this he guides a small tube up the artery into the heart. Dye is injected into the heart and then pictures are taken of the heart to determine if and what may be causing one’s symptoms. It really is a wonderful, almost miraculous medical procedure that is relatively painless. I was awake (barely) for the entire event. However, what the doctor discovered and reported to me and my family was anything but wonderful and painless. He discovered a condition called – Dilated Cardio Myopathy – Why do medical terms have to sound so frightening? Why can’t they just call it what it is; an enlarged, damaged heart muscle that is not pumping very well. Now that I think about it maybe that is why they call it something I can’t recognize. And why did he have to tell me that I have it. I didn’t choose this; I would never choose this; not for me or anybody else. Not to have something wrong with my heart was the very reason I chose to modify my lifestyle and start running 15 years ago. What happened? I have discovered this week in a fresh way that even though I did not choose DCM I still have a choice. I always have a choice. No matter where we live or who or what we live with or what life gives us to live with; we always have a choice. It is our gift from God. As long as our heart beats it can still choose. What it will choose often depends on how it has been conditioned. One of the insights I gained while running is that it is more important to exercise, train and grow my spiritual heart than it is to condition my physical one. Spiritual heart disease has far more dire consequences than the natural counterpart. A heart that is conditioned and strong can stand up to anything and make the right choice even when it is difficult. As I was contemplating all these things and the consequences of this new discovery in my life, that song popped into my head. I am glad God has conditioned my heart in His word, because this is a song for the strong in heart. I have included the lyrics. Ultimately it is not about our heart as much as it is about His name.

My heart will choose to say; Blessed be His name

What a thought!

Blessed be Your name, in the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name, When I’m found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I’ll
turn back to praise
And when the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name  

 

Blessed be Your name when the sun’s shining down on me
When the world’s “all as it should be”
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering
Though there’s pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

CCLI Song No. 3798438
© 2002 Thankyou Music (Admin. by EMI Christian Music Publishing)
Beth Redman | Matt Redman