March 29

 

Psalm 86:11&12

 

Heart Issues

The words to a contemporary worship song popped into my head this week. They include, “My heart will choose to say.” Those words have gained new meaning in my life. When I think about our world I realize that cultures are defined by choices or the lack of opportunity to choose. We have so many choices in our culture. In fact, I read recently that one of the most important features to buyers of new cars when they are considering which model to purchase is….get ready for this……cup holders. While most of the rest of the world chooses between walking, using public transportation or not going, we are negotiating and fretting over the number and placement of cup holders in our vehicles. We are creatures of choice who have been created to choose. It is our destiny to choose and it is those choices that determine our destiny. The ability to choose is what sets us apart and makes us unique from all the rest of creation. Without the power to choose there can be no genuine love given or received. Our ability to choose is one of the evidences that God created us “in His image.” When I think about our world I also realize how choices illustrate and create power. That is why so many dictators and oppressive regimes limit and control choices… they cannot afford to allow the power of choice by the masses to interfere with their lust for control. So, I can see how unlimited choices can create cultural nearsightedness and how totally limited choices create cultural slavery. For both reasons I have a growing appreciation for the gift of choice and a growing sense of my need to steward this gift well. What will my heart choose? All my thoughts today have been percolating in my mind all week and are the result of something I did not choose. Last week I had a heart catheterization done. About 15 years ago I made a choice to get healthier so I began modifying my diet and running. If you saw me “running’ when I first started you probably wouldn’t have thought of it as running. You might have even thought I was a mail delivery person because my goal in the beginning was simply to run from one mail box to the next before I rested. If I had known then what I learned last Friday. Anyway, with time my distance grew along with the physical pleasure I derived from my new exercise regimen. I also enjoyed the sense of accomplishment that could be measured as I consistently made the choice to run; sometimes in spite of tiredness, foul weather (one snowy day I was almost hit by a snowplow) or other unpleasant circumstances. As I was running I even developed a series of thoughts about the 10 things I have learned from running. One of those thoughts is that “If it is easy, anybody can do it.” Choices are like that. Anybody can make the easy choices. While my running times improved and my distances grew and my insight expanded (some people question the latter), I never really felt that I was making the kind of progress I saw other runners make. I chalked it up to the fact that I started late in life and that others were just more naturally suited for running. But in the last 6 to 8 months my distance, my stamina, my energy have all deteriorated drastically to the point that I am completely fatigued after a short run. Being the insightful person I have become I said to myself, “Something is not right.” I scheduled an appointment with my doctor who sent me to a cardiologist who scheduled me for a heart catheterization. For those who may not know, a heart cath is a procedure where the doctor inserts a catheter into an artery in ones leg. Through this he guides a small tube up the artery into the heart. Dye is injected into the heart and then pictures are taken of the heart to determine if and what may be causing one’s symptoms. It really is a wonderful, almost miraculous medical procedure that is relatively painless. I was awake (barely) for the entire event. However, what the doctor discovered and reported to me and my family was anything but wonderful and painless. He discovered a condition called – Dilated Cardio Myopathy – Why do medical terms have to sound so frightening? Why can’t they just call it what it is; an enlarged, damaged heart muscle that is not pumping very well. Now that I think about it maybe that is why they call it something I can’t recognize. And why did he have to tell me that I have it. I didn’t choose this; I would never choose this; not for me or anybody else. Not to have something wrong with my heart was the very reason I chose to modify my lifestyle and start running 15 years ago. What happened? I have discovered this week in a fresh way that even though I did not choose DCM I still have a choice. I always have a choice. No matter where we live or who or what we live with or what life gives us to live with; we always have a choice. It is our gift from God. As long as our heart beats it can still choose. What it will choose often depends on how it has been conditioned. One of the insights I gained while running is that it is more important to exercise, train and grow my spiritual heart than it is to condition my physical one. Spiritual heart disease has far more dire consequences than the natural counterpart. A heart that is conditioned and strong can stand up to anything and make the right choice even when it is difficult. As I was contemplating all these things and the consequences of this new discovery in my life, that song popped into my head. I am glad God has conditioned my heart in His word, because this is a song for the strong in heart. I have included the lyrics. Ultimately it is not about our heart as much as it is about His name.

My heart will choose to say; Blessed be His name

What a thought!

Blessed be Your name, in the land that is plentiful
Where Your streams of abundance flow
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name, When I’m found in the desert place
Though I walk through the wilderness
Blessed be Your name

Every blessing You pour out I’ll
turn back to praise
And when the darkness closes in, Lord
Still I will say Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your name
Blessed be the name of the Lord
Blessed be Your glorious name  

 

Blessed be Your name when the sun’s shining down on me
When the world’s “all as it should be”
Blessed be Your name

And blessed be Your name on the road marked with suffering
Though there’s pain in the offering
Blessed be Your name

You give and take away
You give and take away
My heart will choose to say
Lord, blessed be Your name

CCLI Song No. 3798438
© 2002 Thankyou Music (Admin. by EMI Christian Music Publishing)
Beth Redman | Matt Redman